Sexy Model Leg Muscles

I've saved up some great messages from this summer. Here are a few of my favorites:


"Clever engaging opening.
Complement regarding you looks an ability to express yourself.
Brilliant insight that impresses you.
Invitation to meet over some type of beverage.
Engaging signature.
 
E"

First up, we have  "E," who -- if he had read my profile at all -- would know that I'm looking for people between the ages of 25 and 30.  Somehow, I feel "50" just isn't in that age range.  Call me crazy, but my first grade teacher taught me to count to 100, and I'm still relatively certain "50" is not between "25 and 30."  Also, this is probably the LAZIEST email I have EVER read.  Instead of actually talking about what you're saying, why not say it?  It's so boring as well I think I fell asleep halfway through.
Also... FIFTY.

or this:

"how do I earn the right to caress your leg muscles?"

Second up we have "MoxA."  Not to be confused with "MoxB."  You know, you hear stories about crazy fetishes, but I don't think even I can comprehend this one.  I will never look at a massage the same way again.  I will also avoid having anyone that remotely resembles MoxA touching my legs.  What the hell.

and this:

"July 22nd:
hey sexy do you model?
 
38 minutes ago:
hey sexy do you model?"


Lastly, we have Dave000.  Oh Dave.  Really, let's just call him "Dave of the Creative Username." Dave has trouble coming up with things to say to women.  Or at least it appears that way from the two times he's attempted to contact me.  Point 1: I'm 5'4"... and curvy.  Point 2: I literally just said to you what I did for a living in my profile.  Didn't read it, Dave?  Yeah, I figured.  Way to show off that fact!  That's totally going to sell me on you.  Point 3:  You forgot to check your IM history.  Remember that one time you asked me back on July 22nd and I didn't respond?  No?  Didn't think so.

-N